A Letter From Rose
by LyricsArePoetry
Summary: After losing Rose, the Doctor find her diary


_**A/N: On Youtube '**__**TheDoctorsRose1**__**' made this vid: **__**/watch?vq-CX1oBKUR8**__** asking for peeps to write FanFics based on the idea…so that is exactly what I am doing:**_

_**A letter from Rose:**_

It had been a few months since the Doctor lost Rose, and his life was hectic as ever. But she was still on his mind. He, no matter how hard he tried, couldn't put Rose Tyler out of his mind. Mostly he didn't want to, he didn't want to forget her, or the times they had had together, it was too important to be forgotten. Too special. It meant too much to him. But he wanted to be able to think about her, and for it not to hurt so much. He wanted to be able to remember their times and smile, because it happened. Instead all he could do was frown, and almost cry, because it was over. And there was no way back.

There was one thing he needed to do though. He didn't know whether it would help. He even wondered if it might make it worse, but he needed to do it. Go in Rose's bedroom. He hadn't been in there since losing her. He had been too afraid at how he would feel in there. But now he felt he had to.

His hand hovered over the handle of the door to Rose's bedroom. He wanted to do this, he _needed _to do this, but he was still worried about it. Eventually he just grabbed hold of the handle, and opened the door. He walked in slowly, and closed the door behind him. He didn't know _why _he closed the door behind him, there wasn't anyone who would come in, he had closed it without thinking really. An automatic reaction.

And there he was, in Rose's bedroom. It was exactly how she had left it. Completely untouched. Her bed was made, but only roughly. The cutting of Jabe's grandfather sat on the cabinet beside Rose's bed, and reminded the Doctor of their 'first date' - as Rose had put it when they visited New Earth. All his memories of Rose circled his head, in no order, and completely out of his control.

'I miss you Rose' He whispered, knowing that Rose couldn't hear him. He felt slightly closer to Rose in her room. But it wasn't much help, she still wasn't there. She still would never be there again. She was still trapped, and he was still alone.

'What's that?' He said to himself, noticing a small book, half hidden under her pillow. He carefully pulled it out.

'Rose Tyler's Diary' The front cover read. The Doctor slowly opened the first page, wondering if maybe he shouldn't read it. He decided to read, so that he could see how Rose felt, and relive his time with her, but from her point of view.

'_Firstly, I guess it goes without saying, no one can ever read this. Firstly because it's a diary, but mainly because I have no idea what sorts of things I'm going to see, but I know for a fact no one would believe a word of it. And they would think I was crazy. Maybe I am crazy, maybe this is all some sort of mad dream. Maybe soon I'll wake up and realise the guy - alien - I'm falling in love with isn't even real'_

The Doctor stopped at the line 'the guy - alien - I'm falling in love with'. This was Rose's first entry, the Doctor didn't know when she wrote it, but he knew it must've been early on because she wasn't sure what to expect. She started to fall in love with him right from the start. Just like he did. He only just realised that he started to fall in love with Rose straight away. He skipped to Rose's last entry.

_'Planet Earth. This is where I was born and this I'm sure is where I'm going to die. For the first 19 years of my life, nothing happened nothing at all. Not ever. Unless you include waking up, going to work, coming home, and eating chips. Some life. But then I met the Doctor and everything changed. He took me away from that nothing life, in the TARDIS. He is the most amazing man I ever met and ever will meet. He showed me the whole of Time and Space. He showed me the most amazing things. Things I would've never imagined possible. Things no human would ever imagine possible. Things no one could ever believe unless they saw it. Things, even reading what I've written about them, that are completely indescribable. Amazing things, and terrible things. I wouldn't take back one minute of it. But now it's got to end, and I'm going to lose him forever. First there was Torchwood. Then the Army of Ghosts. Then the Cybermen and the Daleks. Then came the war. And that's how it all ended._

_What I don't think the Doctor knows, and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance to tell him, is that I love him. I love him so much. And I really cant imagine my life without him in it. I am thankfully for everything he showed me. Even the times when I was in danger, and close to death. I just hope that I do get the chance to tell him that I love him. But also to tell him, that after me not to stay alone. To find someone else to travel with. I don't want him to be lonely. I know he can never stop being lonely because of losing his planet in the Time War, but I don't want him to be completely alone. I don't want him to feel the way I do about losing him. I want him to be as happy as possible. I don't want him to be hurting._

_Doctor I hope you read this one day. Please don't stay alone, please for me, find someone to travel with. Smile and laugh like you did with me. Be happy. Do that for me. _

_I'll always love you._

_Rose Tyler. xxx'_

The Doctor realised that he was crying by the time he looked up from Rose's last entry. He realised she must be hurting as much as he is, if not more. More? Was that possible? He didn't think it was, he hoped it wasn't, he didn't want to think of Rose hurting more than him. He didn't want to think of Rose hurting at all. But he knew she would be. He knew by the look on her face when he said goodbye. He wiped his eyes, and started at the last couple of lines. 'I'll always love you. Rose Tyler. xxx', and he wished he had had the chance to tell her, he too…loves her. He heard her tell him, and now he had it in writing at the end of her diary, but he had no chance to tell her. He'd never have the chance to tell her again. But there was something he could do for her. 'Please don't stay alone, please for me, find someone to travel with'. He realised he had to do that. He had to for himself, but mostly for Rose. And he would, he would find someone. Soon.

But for now, he had to read the rest of Rose's diary.


End file.
